


softcore

by sngchnglxlvr



Series: softcore universe [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Falling In Love, Idiots in Love, Lee Felix (Stray Kids) is Whipped, Love Confessions, M/M, POV Alternating, Some Crack, SpearB, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, also mustnt forget, changbin is pan, changlix centred, dance student felix, felix also has adhd, felix bi, felix is asexual, felix is lowkey a fanboy, felix's first love is changbin, hyunjin speaks like once, i love : changlix, i still suck at tags smh, i think this is enough tags, im crying, jeongin is a high school senior, like so sappy wow, lowkey emotional, lowkey tho, minho is nonbinary, minsung is couple goals, music student changbin, no one is straight okay, seo changbin is emo, soft & sappy af, soft soft & soft, the rest are mentioned sorry luvs, they hold hands uwu, they/them minho, this fic broke me ngl, woochan is mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-08
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2020-08-13 02:31:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20166694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sngchnglxlvr/pseuds/sngchnglxlvr
Summary: freckle and emo boy kiss kiss fall in loveORfelix spots himself a cutie in the library and suddenly knows what love feels like, while changbin is just lowkey a mess & wants felix to know hes worth more than he thinks





	softcore

**Author's Note:**

> yall this fic made me so soft and it doesnt help that the neighbourhood's music played throughout the writing of this fic and inspired me so much (single is currently playing and i suddenly cant breathe?). n e way, i started writing this who nows when and found it in my drafts on my phone and thought, hay, why not continue and see where it goes ?? now its an 11k monster that owns my whole heart.  
ive wanted to write felix being asexual since forever bcs i already find him so relatable, so writing him feeling some of the emotions ive felt being a-spec rlly made me feel some good good kind of way. minho is also nonbinary bcs the first fic i worked on i used they/them pronouns accidentally and it just stuck (i love it tho).  
n e way, i hope yall enjoy this one-shot. theres so many uwus idk how i got through this alive. ive never written smth so soft, ngl. if you want, follow my twt acc @chnglxnm. i basically just cry abt felix & skz in general fjfh
> 
> NB : this fic is based where i live in south africa, cape town, but its not too important hehe (besides the education system being different oof)
> 
> NOW E N J O Y

Changbin practically stumbles into the school library, yawning into the crook of his arm, with an empty bag on his back ready to cause him pain when he’s done venturing for books.

The first couple of months of his second year in university was a huge pain in his ass. He’d thought that maybe he could get away with being a crappy student, but he never really learns. Changbin guesses it comes with his reputation, but damn does he wish he could do fuck all and not even get noticed for it, like so many other students in this school. But, he guesses, being in a department that only allows a very small number of students a year makes it difficult for his music teacher to forget about him, anyway. He doesn’t think much about his creative writing courses or his English classes since he's only minoring in them, but it’s all still a real pain in his ass. Changbin lowkey misses his high school days where he could focus primarily on his music, and somehow pass his subjects with good grades. Here, sadly, you're expected to actually study, and attend classes, and if you don’t? Well, good luck to you, especially if you’re fucking Mr. Seo Changbin.

He’s stressed, but the thought of Jeongin coming over this weekend, and the plans to go out to a burger joint in the city with Jeongin, Chan and Woojin, makes him smile slightly, forgetting about how tiring this week is going to be, or just how tiring his life is in general.

Plopping his bag down by a vacant table, he shuffles to the music theory section of the library and gets to work. Chan agreed with what their professor said and wants him to work on his piano skills (even though he doubts he needs it that much) so he goes through books upon books of sheet music and beginner guides to playing the piano, and it doesn’t take long for him to already have a couple of books stacked together on his table.

But there’s one particular book he’s been waiting on since last week, but there’s obviously a problem.

It’s times like these that he wishes he wasn’t so lazy and actually asked the librarian to keep the book behind the desk as Chan had told him to. Because whoever designed this library was not very mindful of the people who are not all that tall. And it’s not like Changbin is even THAT particularly short.

He's just shorter than the top of these damn bookcases by way too much.

He can’t stay sitting here, glaring at the damn bookshelves though. Changbin’s pretty sure he’s already gotten the odd confused and concerned look, probably thinking he wants to attack the damn bookshelves since a lot of people already seem to think he's stupidly aggressive that way. He’s tempted to ask the librarian if she has a stool he can stand on or anything to help him reach the top of the bookshelves, but suddenly he feels embarrassment take over.

_God, I’m such an idiot_, he thinks, making his way over to where the book is. Looking around to make sure no one is paying attention to him (thank fuck people who use the library give a fuck about studying because if he was anywhere else, he would’ve never been able to get away from at least one pair of wandering eyes), Changbin goes onto his tippy toes and tries to reach the book. It’s literally right there. His fingers just graze the book’s spine but still, he’s not tall enough to grab it.

If only his professor didn’t find that damn book so important. If only Chan didn’t think he needed to work on his piano skills too. If fucking ONLY he was at least an inch taller. These ifs were endless.

Changbin stands there for a minute reassessing the situation. He notices some girl walk into the book aisle he’s in. He would’ve asked her for help if she wasn’t shorter than him.

“Fuck,” he seethes under his breath.

He decides to try reaching for the book one last time, still too stubborn to ask the librarian for help, but while he’s doing it, a figure suddenly pops up behind him and grabs the book for him with hardly as much effort as Changbin. Not expecting it, though, Changbin jumps on the spot and hits his back against the person's chest and feels his face heat up.

“You alright there?”

_Oh dear lord in heaven what the fuck is that voice?_ Turning around, he comes face to face with the person who not only grabbed the book for him but the person with the low, deep ass voice that literally shook Changbin to the core. But he doesn’t look like the type of person who’d be the owner of that baritone voice. The person standing in front of him exudes softness. The fluffy blonde hair? The chubby-ish cheeks dotted with freckles? The small, shy, and 100% charming smile? He’s the one with that voice.

Changbin clears his throat before putting back on his usual dark, intimidating, “look”, and simply looks back at him with unperturbed eyes. “Yeah. Thanks.”

He reaches for the book, wanting out of there FAST. He’s still kind of pushed up against the bookcase. If Changbin doesn’t make a beeline straight to his desk he bets he’s going to turn into putty right there in front of the cute, foreign-sounding, gorgeous boy. But just as Changbin makes to grab the book from the guy’s hand, he hides it behind his back with an apologetic smile. “Not so fast!”

Oh, he’s so screwed.

“I’ve never seen you around.” He starts, finally taking a step back. At least now he can breathe, even though he still wants to get away. “I come here every day since my roommate keeps bringing their boyfriend over to watch anime so it’s hard to study.”

Changbin doesn’t know how to answer. He’s never been put into this situation before. Plus, any cute person who talked to him ended up leaving as soon as they could because of how daunting they think having a conversation with him could be, or purely out of flustered embarrassment. So, the fact that this guy is clearly trying to have a conversation with him is kind of hard to process. “I don’t come here often. I prefer to stay up in the studios working.”

“Studios?” His eyes seem to sparkle at this. How can he be so excited about studios? “Art?”

“No. Music.”

He brings the book that he was still hiding behind his back up to his face and as he reads the title, this dumbfounded look crosses his face. “I’m so stupid...” he mutters to himself, shaking his head slightly. “You don’t really look like an art student, anyway.” He gives Changbin a once-over and he tries with all his strength to keep his calm composure. “But I guess my best friend doesn’t look much like an artist even if he’s majoring in art.” He shrugs, a sheepish smile adorning his face.

Changbin still has no idea how to respond, so he just wings it. “Do I not look like a music student, then?”

“I- what do you mean?”

Dammit, he should’ve just kept his mouth shut. The less talking he does, the quicker he’ll get out of this conversation. But no, he just has to ask a bloody question that this guy doesn’t even understand. “You thought I do art, not music, and if people who major in art have a certain look, what’s a music student’s look?”

He doesn’t make sense. He can tell. But somehow the guy catches on anyway. Thank God his awkwardness is distracting him from Changbin’s own awkwardness. “Music students generally look edgy,” He motions towards Changbin’s outfit. “You’re only wearing a hoodie and sweatpants. You look more like someone who studies maths or law.”

“Because I look dead inside?”

He starts sputtering, flailing his free hand around a bit. “N-no! That’s not what I meant at all-“

Changbin interrupts his frantic verbal diarrhoea by bursting into laughter. He really tried to keep it in, but the guy's panicked reaction to a stupid joke had him almost in tears. He’s too damn tired to seem so composed. He seriously can’t keep up this act for so long.

Just as the laugh begins to fade into snorts and airy breaths, he hears a faint “okay, wow” and realises that maybe going from neutral to a hundred out of the blue wasn’t the best idea. But when he looks up at him Changbin doesn’t notice any weariness or unsureness in his posture. He’s simply staring at Changbin with wide eyes in complete fascination.

“It was a joke,” Changbin smiles at him, making a “it’s whatever” gesture. “Chan says I look dead practically every morning so I figured.”

“Yeah...” is all he says, nodding his head slightly.

“Anyway, this is me on a regular day. You should see me on a good day. Maybe then you’ll think I look like a music student.” Changbin raises his eyebrows as he watches him get all flustered, cheeks going pink, but somehow complimenting his dark freckles. How is he so cute without doing anything?

“You say that as if I’ll get to see you on a good day.”

At that, Changbin decides that if he continues talking to him, he’s going to combust. That his heart is going to fall straight out of his chest. Without really answering the question, he just smiles and says, “I really need to get to studying before I get my ass whooped so...” he motions towards the book still in the guys’ grasp.

“Oh, yeah, I forgot. Sorry about that.”

He hands the book over and watches as Changbin does a weak salute as a goodbye, heading towards his desk. Finally, he feels like he can start breathing again.

“Wait!” The guy exclaims way too loudly, getting a collective shush from a bunch of nearby students, and glare from the librarian. Throwing a few apologies out to them in a whisper, he looks Changbin in the eyes and asks something that totally catches him off guard. “Do you want to get coffee sometime?”

Changbin can’t believe his ears. “Are you asking me out on a date?” He can tell the cogs in his brain are working on overdrive at that question. This guy has no clue if Changbin is even queer, does he? He decides to save him, just this once, because despite wanting to run away, he actually kinda enjoyed their short conversation, and loved how despite how shy he seemed, he still tried to talk to Changbin and wasn’t even scared away. “Yeah, let’s get coffee sometime.”

He nods his head a couple times, way too excited, but it makes Changbin giggle internally, in a good way. As he sits back down in his chair, he watches as the guy heads out of the library, lost in thought as he continues to bump into people. He leaves with a trail of apologies behind him.

Only then, though, does Changbin realise that he doesn’t even know his name, nor does he have a way to contact him. _I don’t even know what he’s studying, so I can’t ask someone in his department_. 

For the rest of his time spent in that library, he can’t help but feel a bit disappointed in the fact that he might not end up going on that coffee date anyway.

☁︎

“Guys, you’re NOT going to believe what happened in the library today.” Felix bursts into his dorm, not caring much for the two people snogging on his beanbag. He’d be lying if he even batted an eyelash. He’s so used to seeing his roommate, Minho, and best friend, Jisung, canoodling, that it’s become almost second nature to him.

As Jisung jumps up in the beanbag to give Felix his full attention, Minho slams their face right where Jisung’s face used to be. Poor Minho just groans, leaving their face planted in the beanbag. He’s sure they mumbled curses but he doesn’t really care.

“I saw a cute boy.” And at that, Jisung, no joke, makes a sound that’s closer to a dementor screech than an excited, and equally as confused, squeal. “He was too short to reach this book he really wanted and—oh my God, guys—he was on his tippy toes. HE LOOKED SO PRECIOUS?” He continues, busy untangling himself from the multiple jackets he had on. “I’m pretty sure he’s older than me but I don’t care. How can someone look that cute by merely breathing?”

“Someone’s already whipped,” Minho snorts, finally getting up from the beanbag and making their way to their bed. “You literally never crush on anyone, yet you’re the most bisexual person I know.”

“A whole Hyunjin exists, Minho.” Jisung rolls his eyes but brings his attention back to Felix. “I agree with Minho, though. You NEVER react like this towards ANYONE.” Felix nods in understanding, now making sense of why Jisung reacted the way he did.

It’s true, though. Even though he’s known he is bi since he was a kid, he’s also asexual. Felix blames his asexuality for why he never really found someone worth dating, but he WANTS to date. He’s never been in a relationship before even though he’s been confessed to multiple times. Felix knows better than to lead someone on in hopes of somehow gaining feelings for them. Minho, Hyunjin and Seungmin all think he’s aromantic but he wants to know the gushiness and the excitement of being in love and dating. Jisung seems to be the only one ever on his side.

Felix plops himself on his bed with a sigh. But oh, the way that emo looking dude made his heart flutter was insane. He doesn’t believe in soulmates, but damn does it feel meant to be.

When he had walked into that library, all he wanted to do was hand in a book Felix has kept for way longer than he was supposed to, but instead Felix came across him trying desperately to reach the top of the shelf, and it’s like he couldn’t control his body, because before he knew it, he was on his way over to help him. Because, yeah, these bookshelves are just a bit too big, even he struggles slightly to reach the top, but the poor dude was a bit shorter than him so, he tried with no success. Only when Felix got the book, scaring him slightly and making him turn around, did Felix realise that this guy he just helped wasn’t some ordinary, kinda cute person. No, he turned around and was met with a rush of… adrenaline? Felix felt the way he did during and after dance lessons and practices, all at once. His heart was racing like crazy, he instantly started sweating, and he's pretty sure his hands were lowkey shaking. It was the best, but the scariest feeling, because all he could think was “wow”. His eyes were wide, and his cheeks were dusted in this slight pink colour that reminded him of the soft streaks of pink clouds in the sky when the sun sets. He didn’t have makeup on which was odd but he looked so soft and manly at the same time. Felix was more than infatuated, he was intimidated, by his looks, by the way the atmosphere changed the instant he realised he wasn’t fitting his outward appearance of “no fucks given”, by how his eyes darkened considerably. It wasn’t a bad kind of intimidation though. It was the kind that made you flustered, but excited. He doesn’t know how to explain it, but at that moment he couldn’t even explain what he was feeling.

Throughout the whole way too short conversation, he went from stoic to soft so many times, but the façade seemed to finally break when Felix made a huge fool of himself and he started laughing. It didn’t match his voice at all. It was higher, and a bit rapid, and so unique, that Felix felt himself shutdown in awe.

_God_, he thinks to himself, _why when the first time I try talking to someone I find cute do I make myself seem like a bigger dumbass than I really am?_

Then Felix suddenly asked him to go out with him, and Felix was pretty sure he was about to explode. He bet his face was on actual FIRE at that point, especially when he asked if it was a date. He was trying so hard to figure out if he should say “as friends” or be honest and admit that he kinda likes him a lot already and that a date would be, wow, so great. But clearly, in that situation, he was the more mature one. Felix left that library feeling like a million bucks despite the fact he bumped into every person who was in range.

So, yeah, it was very odd for him to suddenly fall into such a situation when he never really has, but here he is. Fallen.

“I know, it’s true. But something about the way he was trying not to get attention while trying to reach that book was oddly endearing.”

“So you just saw some random guy in the library and thought he was cute? Out of the blue? And all he was doing was... getting a book?” Minho shakes their head in disbelief. “And here I thought you’d end up falling for some Casanova as your first. Go figure.”

“Maybe he is a Casanova?” Jisung ponders.

Felix only nods enthusiastically. He seemed pretty damn confident at times, maybe he does have some secret romantic moves under his hoodie sleeves.

“Tell us more?” Minho lifts their head up off the pillow to raise an eyebrow in Felix’s direction.

“Well, he was kind of intimidating? But I surprised him when I got the book for him and I swear his cheeks were a bit pink,” he remembers. But he still can’t get over the fact that in an instant his face had just dropped and he ended up looking very different to his blushing self previously. But he looked like a man—which is unsurprising because he legit is, but, well, more masculine? Like, his aura. “We talked for a bit and I’m pretty sure I made a fool of myself but I couldn’t help it! One second he’d look like he’s about to skin me alive—and I’d thank him for it, obviously—and the next he’s the softest bean I’ve ever seen. It’s just rude.”

It’s silent for a couple seconds while Felix just sits there internally huffing in his uwus.

“Oh my God,” Minho whispers in awe, breaking the silence abruptly. “You is actually very fucking whipped.”

“We been knew, babe.”

“I don’t really know how to feel about that,” Felix admits. He hardly knows the dude yet here he is, sounding very whipped indeed.

“What’s his name?”

“Oh.”

“Felix, please don’t tell me you never asked for his name.” Jisung looks ready to slap Felix upside his head while Minho just laughs maniacally behind him.

This entire time Felix was too busy thinking about _him_ that he didn’t realise he doesn’t even know his _name_.

“Jesus, I'm such an idiot,” Felix stuffs his face in his hands and rubs at his eyes, trying to think if maybe he mentioned his name or something? Anything? “I don’t even have his number. How did I expect to go on that damn coffee date if I don’t have his NUMBER?”

“First off, I agree, you’re an idiot,” Minho starts. “BUT he agreed to go on a date with you so, I wouldn’t panic too much. He probably feels the same. Just ask Jisung if he knows the dude.”

“Why ask Jisung?”

Jisung rolls his eyes. “Do you not know me? I'm a whole social butterfly. Just tell me this: what department is he in, and what does he look like?”

“You seriously think you’ve maybe talked to him before?” Jisung continues to stare at him with narrow eyes. “Okay, well, he definitely didn’t seem like the type of person who likes to socialise but whatever.” Felix thinks about exactly how to describe him because he doesn’t think “manly jaw, soft fringe, kissable cheeks” is much of a helpful description. “Well, first off, he's a music student.”

“Well, that helps a shit ton since the music department is the smallest.”

“Okay, well he was shorter than me, obviously. And he had dark, short hair, and a pointed chin? He seems like the type of person who wears sweatpants and hoodies almost 24/7. He also mentioned someone called Chan? Maybe a friend? And-”

“ARE YOU SHITTING WITH ME?” Jisung suddenly launches himself at Felix, toppling them both into the multitude of pillows on his bed. “You were talking to Changbin? Maybe flirting? How the fuck did you do that? The first time I had a conversation with him he didn’t even blink once, Lix. ONCE.”

“Woah, calm down! Changbin? Blinking? Excuse me?”

“Bruh, a lot of people know who Changbin is. Even me.” Minho titters.

Felix doesn’t understand what's going on. Jisung is highkey freaking out and Minho continues to probably think Felix is an oblivious idiot.

“Can someone please explain to me, like, everything?”

“Y’know SpearB?”

Felix deadpans. “Of course I know who he is. I'm not that big of a peasant.”

“Beg to differ,” Minho interjects. Jisung cusses them out, telling them to shush because apparently, this conversation is very important to him.

Felix scowls at Minho. “No one in this university doesn’t know him. Doesn’t he legit have like 500k followers on SoundCloud?” SpearB was this music student a year above Felix who is known as a music prodigy in their school. He doesn’t know whether it’s a rumour or not, but apparently, back in high school he joined SoundCloud and started making music. He hit it off in his senior year of high school and, despite his late application into the music department at our school, he got in purely based off of his popularity and pure talent. When people started finding this out, he slowly started becoming popular at school—but there's not a lot of people who actually know what he looks like. He reckons it’s because some people explain him as a shut-in—rarely comes to school, and when he does, he's up in the music studios doing whatever music students do, and what he does best. The instant Felix joined uni, and met Minho, he met their boyfriend Jisung who introduced him to SpearB. He's been an avid listener since, but he's like a lot of other people—Felix knows the music, but not the person behind it. Or, at least not very well.

“Yeah, but do you know his actual name?”

Felix shakes his head no, still very confused.

“His name is Seo Changbin.”

“Okay, cool?”

“My DUDE. The guy you were talking to? The very intimidating looking dude? Kinda short? Music student? EMO?” Jisung looks about ready to beat his ass. “That’s Changbin. That’s SpearB. YOU WERE TALKING TO SPEARB, YOU SLOW ASS TIT.”

Felix looks over to Minho who is merely smirking in his direction, then back at the incredulous Jisung, and then at the floor.

“I was talking to SpearB the entire time?”

“That seems to be the case.” Minho finally gets off their bed and places a sarcastically empathetic hand on his shoulder. “Maybe it’s time to take a break from all those old ass books you find so important for some reason, and join the rest of us in being friends with Changbin.”

“Friends?” Felix chokes, shoving Minho's hand away. “I don’t want to be his friend.”

“Yeah, good luck with that. He's kinda like you, I think? Either way, he's yet to show any interest to anyone for as long as I’ve known him.” Jisung bumps his shoulder into his, getting up to grab his backpack and jacket. “Anyway, as much as this is both hilarious and crazy, Minho and I had plans to study in my dorm tonight so- “

“Yeah, whatever, I don’t care. Give me his number?”

“What? Why you so rude- “

“Jisung.”

Minho and Jisung glance at each other before Jisung shrugs and quickly sends Felix Changbin’s number. “Whatever happens, don’t fanboy on him, yeah?”

“I'm not THAT stupid.”

“Sure,” Jisung puts his hands up, gesturing for Felix to stop “attacking him”. “Whatever you say.”

“Say hi for me!” Minho exclaims, grabbing Jisung's hand and pushing him with them out of their dorm, slamming the door before Felix could answer them.

“Alright, Changbin,” he saves the number in his contacts. “Changbin, Changbin, Changbin. Bin? Binnie? BinBin?” Felix says out loud thinking about what to call him. “No, that’s all just too weird. Changbin it is.”

He opens up a chat and gets to typing, sitting back against the wall, on his bed, with his bottom lip snuggly placed between his teeth.

☁︎

Changbin was busy trying to find the right key on his keyboard when his phone buzzes, reminding him that he somehow forgot to turn his phone off. He grabs his phone, about to turn it off when he notices that a random number has messaged him. Curious, he opens up the chat and is happily surprised.

**ah, hi, this is felix**

**are you changbin?**

**oh, wait fuck is this weird???**

**maybe i shouldn’t have sent that**

**how does one delete text messages….?**

**well, hello there**

**yeah, its changbin**

**jufhwrfj**

**hi **

**^^**

**sorry about the spam**

**no worries**

**anyway, how did you get my number?**

**from a friend, actually…….**

**he apparently knows you??? jisung ????**

**oh yeah him**

**he's cool**

**i'm so telling him you called him c o o l**

**shit**

**but**

**i'm glad he gave you my number**

**and told you my actual name**

**yeah**

**me too**

**i'm glad you're glad**

**i mean-**

**hehe**

**cute**

**SHUT UPPPP**

**:)**

**also, i must confess**

**again?**

**I NEVER CONFESSED BEFOREIWJFH **

**ANYway**

**jisung told me not to mention it but**

**i feel bad**

**what?**

**i didn’t know you were SpearB x-x**

**oh**

**you didn’t?**

**no**

**i'm stupid**

**but yknow it doesn’t matter much to me….**

**i don’t really care**

**i wanted it to be lowkey beginning of last year but then decided its whatever**

**just surprised you didn’t know and that jisung never told you**

**i'm as surprised as you are jcfefj**

**did you go ahead and tell people willy nilly?? lmao**

**i would be lying if i didn’t mention it once for free food..**

**yes i approve **

**mm**

**are you busy tomorrow? around 5pm?**

**no….**

**coffee date? maybe?**

**you still wanna go on that?**

**yeah ofc**

**wait do you not? **

**:(**

**HDWEHJ OFC I WANNA GO STILL**

**someone’s eager**

**when i see you tomorrow imma slap you >:(**

**hehe**

**see you tomorrow then**

**at that café in front of the uni**

**hjrfejf okay**

**see you**

**tomorrow **

**UFHEJFE JISUNG I'M GOING ON A DATE WITH CHANGBIN TOMORROW EBHE I'M SO EXCITED**

**wrong chat..**

**HRFEH OH FUCK IGNORE THAT JWDH**

**<3**

☁︎

A couple minutes ago Felix was panicking in class, but now he's panicking in a café.

Last night, when Changbin brought up the date, Felix was beyond ecstatic. He wasn’t sure how to bring it up, but the fact Changbin did it without beating around the bush, made Felix realise that maybe, just maybe, Changbin was as excited as he was to see each other again. God, he doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to this feeling. And fully understand how crazy it is that this is his first ever official date.

After they both agreed on a time and place, they ended up talking pretty late into the night about irrelevant bullshit that made Felix way too happy. At one point, Changbin asked if he could call him, so he could work on his piano while talking. Felix had asked if he was annoying him and that he didn’t mind ending it for the night, but Changbin insisted, saying that he really doesn’t mind. That he LIKES talking to him. What? Felix? Him? He talked about Minecraft for a solid thirty minutes in spam messages. How? So when Changbin called him up, he effortlessly asked Felix about his major and classes, and it possibly might be the easiest conversation he's ever had with someone over the phone.

Felix talked about the best, and worst, parts of being a dance student. How he loved the physical aspect of it—he's loved dancing since he was a kid in primary school—but that he wasn’t doing so well in the theory part since he's always struggled to study. He's able to translate his ADHD tendencies into his dancing, but studying was a whole ‘nother ballgame. Felix could not concentrate on something completely still to save his life. It made him a great dancer, but a shitty student. Changbin listened to all of this without interruption, and only showed empathy, but also some relatability. Somehow, it's like he knew that Felix hated it, found it an actual struggle, and didn’t tell him to “stop using excuses to stop working”, or any other bullcrap he's been hearing most his life.

Honestly, that whole night could possibly be one of his better nights. He didn’t study at all, he didn’t get the right amount of sleep he's supposed to, and he certainly ended up showering that morning instead, but none of that mattered. Changbin was so easy to talk to, and every word he spoke inspired Felix in a way he never thought he could be inspired. No wonder people called him a lyrical genius, a master producer, a music prodigy. His words reminded him of his old passions. Made Felix miss his old, lyric writing days, and all he wanted to do was watch the way Changbin works and use that to fuel his inspiration even more.

This morning he had woken up feeling like he got zero sleep. Which, ultimately, is kind of true, since he was so caught up in Changbin and the date that he couldn’t seem to fall asleep with ease. Felix has never groaned so much in the morning as he did then. Minho showed up soon after he woke up and they were actually surprised to see him looking so beaten down.

“Jeez, what happened to you?” They had asked, watching as Felix opened up his closet door and grabbed his towel, zombie walking over to his desk to get his toiletry bag.

“I stayed up late last night talking to Changbin, and then was way too restless to fall asleep.” He answered, trying to stop a yawn from coming.

Minho just nodded their head in unsureness but kept their mouth shut because they knew they weren’t going to get much from Felix. It’s not like Felix has never endured a sleepless night before, but the pills he takes generally knocks him out, but that didn’t seem to be the case last night, sadly. He could’ve done with a couple odd dreams instead of Changbin's laughter bouncing off the walls of his head.

Felix was in the shower for a long time, trying to wake himself up and figure out what one wears when going to a coffee date. He knew he can’t pull up in his black leather pants, but he doesn’t think showing up in his oversized pastel pink hoodie was a great idea either.

He went to all the classes he needed to go to, met up with Hyunjin, Jisung and Seungmin for lunch in their schools' moderately okay cafeteria, and trust that he got a handful of advice from all three of them.

Hyunjin actually seemed like the less shocked one out of them when Felix told him the whole story. “I met him once,” Hyunjin had said, catching them all by surprise. “I saw him during the university tour last year. He was showing around this really cute guy so I obviously approached them. Since then I’ve been mutuals with the both of them on Twitter and Instagram, and trust, Changbin tweets at least once a week about how much he craves cuddles.” They had all just stared at him wide-eyed because that didn’t sound like Changbin at all. Or, well, Felix was more stuck in his feels, because it kind of made sense, even if only a bit. “Just because he stares down people doesn’t mean he's a man without needs or desires.” Hyunjin bobbed his eyebrows up and down which made Felix blush like a mad man.

“Stop that, you're scaring him!” Jisung frowns, making them burst into laughter while Felix just played with his chicken salad. Thinking about dating someone who isn’t asexual already scared the crap out of Felix, so he really didn’t want to think about it at that moment.

Before he left to his next class, Seungmin had surprised him with a quick hug and a good luck, and that really made him feel better and at peace, for maybe the next twenty minutes, before he realised that his next class was his last class bef0re he meets up with Changbin.

And now that leaves him here.

Its almost 5pm and he's a ball of nerves.

Felix's class ended earlier than expected, making him show up at the café thirty minutes before he needed to. He really was hoping Changbin would’ve been the one to wait for him, not Felix, because fuck, he hates waiting, especially in anticipation. But here he is, anxious as fuck, and have been waiting for over twenty minutes already.

His mind has wandered to many places since he messaged Changbin to let him know he was early.

**okay**

**i'm still in class so i’ll still only be able to make it at 5**

**sorry to make you wait**

**see you soon**

**<3**

Felix really didn’t mind, but let’s cut back to the fact that he hates waiting.

He's been thinking about exactly what to say. He's been preparing himself for the worst and, please God, the best. Every time the door opens, every time he feels that gust of cold air hit his back, he turns around almost instantly, feeling his nerves peak, only for them to lower a bit in disappointment when it isn’t Changbin.

Right now, all Felix wants to do is run away and act like these feelings are nothing more than just intimidation and curiosity inducing. Felix thinks he could do all that with ease, even though he knows he's lying to himself.

As he's sitting there fidgeting with a fork, his phone buzzes. He jumps in his seat and quickly retrieves his phone from his jean pocket, sadly being met with a message from Jisung.

**did u see changbin earlier?!????!?!??**

**eye**

**no? ive been too busy**

**yknow**

**panicking**

**and running to every class in hopes to not accidentally bump into him**

**yeah that makes sense**

**bcs if u had seen him earlier**

**oof**

**boy**

**ud make me sing at ur funeral**

**we all know you're the last person id ask to sing at my funeral**

**stfu**

**n e way**

**good luck bcs**

**felix**

**mans is a whole god damn S N A C K**

**ohhhhhhfuckno**

And that’s when, unfortunately, Changbin shows up (but also, very fortunately, because its Changbin, obviously). He knows this how? Well, he could trust the message Changbin sent stating he's outside, or he could literally follow the stares of his fellow students inside the café who are whispering away.

Felix turns around and, yup, there Changbin is walking on the other side of the road, stopping in front of the café to wait to cross the street, and damn he swears he forgets how to breathe for a second.

Jisung, honestly, spoke too lightly about the issue. Like every person on twitter liked to say, Changbin didn’t look like a snack, he looked like a whole full course meal (seriously, someone save him, it's just criminal). When Changbin mentioned how he looked better when he tried, it was definitely an understatement. Here Felix thought Changbin just preferred a more comfortable lifestyle when in reality he had more of a fashion sense than him and Jisung combined.

The weather lately has been pretty cold, but Changbin is literally in a plain black shirt, tucked into a pair of blue, faded looking fit jeans with holes in the knees, and you’d think it couldn’t get any gayer, but his jeans are rolled up at the bottom above a pair of high-top black converse sneakers. And somehow, the backpack seems to add to the whole look, making him look even more like a fed-up student. How in the world Felix feels underdressed for a COFFEE date to a simple tee and jeans is beyond him.

Everyone staring makes sense now, because yeah, if someone who’s already pretty well-known in school shows up not wearing sweatpants for a change, and actually looking as good as THAT, everyone is bound to stare.

As Changbin walks into the café, Felix stays in his seat, rooted in the spot, especially when Changbin notices him staring and just gives him the widest smile known to mankind, making Felix melt.

“Hi,” Changbin says simply, smile still in place, and Felix really wonders how him, and anyone else, could really think he's scary and unapproachable. “May I?” he gestures to the seat after Felix remains silent. Taking in a quick breath, Felix motions for him to sit down with a small smile.

A waitress shows up just as Changbin sits down opposite Felix. She takes their orders and leaves Felix back into a panic.

“You really underestimated it when you told me how good you generally look on a good day.” Felix blurts without warning. He wants to hit his head against the table but Changbin just lets out a snort.

“I literally just put a shirt and jeans on,” Changbin nudges his foot against Felix’s, making his face warm unexpectedly. “I even wore these shoes yesterday.”

Flabbergasted, Felix just shakes his head. “That doesn’t make your case any better. Do you know how long it took me to decide what to wear?”

Changbin raises an eyebrow, the right corner of his lips perking up. “You could’ve shown up in anything and I would’ve been happy.”

Felix groans, leaning forward in his chair. “Shut UP. Stop being so suave, you smooth criminal.” Changbin giggles the way he did yesterday, and the act warms his chest.

For some reason, he can believe that Changbin would’ve been happy to speak to Felix, in public, wearing a black plastic bag. But he can tell, purely by the way Changbin had pursed his lips earlier, that he was indeed enjoying the effort Felix had put in. He still feels like an idiot for just wearing a thin navy sweater and black skinny jeans, but the necklace was Minho's touch, somehow making what he thought was a bland look, into something a little bit more “I'm going on a date and want to look good but also like I didn’t try”.

Their drinks arrive, and Felix takes a sip, eyeing Changbin sipping away at his very sweet looking iced-coffee. “I didn’t peg you as a sweet iced-coffee drinker.”

Changbin just shrugs, putting his drink down and leaning his elbows against the table. “I usually like a lot of caffeine in my coffee to help me stay awake, so all the sugar helps with the bitterness.”

_Yes_, Felix thinks, nodding as he drinks his non-caffeinated tea. _All that sweetness he emits makes sense._

“But I'm guessing you can’t drink caffeine anyway.”

Felix nods, remembering how pissed off he was when his doctor had told him that any bit of caffeine won’t help him sleep at night. No matter how much it can help him concentrate when working, it affects his sleeping pattern, and that is worse in his doctor’, and his parent’s, eyes. “It sucks, but I've come to enjoy tea a lot more than before.”

Changbin hums in agreement. “If I could give up coffee, I would, but I barely sleep at night so the caffeine helps me stay awake during school.”

“Insomnia issues, amirite?”

Changbin lets out a puff of air in amusement. “Yeah, insomnia issues.”

They go silent, and Felix thinks for a split second that they’ll end up stuck in awkward silence, but the pregnant pause doesn’t last long before Changbin speaks up again, being Felix’s whole ass saviour.

“How was class?”

If anyone besides Changbin had asked him that question, he would’ve rioted. He would’ve questioned them and beat them down for asking him that, because no one gives a fuck about how class went. But the fact that it’s Changbin changes that because he knows that he actually wants to know, and that’s insane. What is a Changbin? Felix doesn’t know.

They talk about their classes for a bit, about how boring it was, or how much information they were taught, and the effort it takes to retain so much info. They talked a bit like two friends would after work. Moaning about whatever co-worker pissed them off that day. About how everyone was too loud and concentrating was a thing in the past. They spoke about such normal things, but with the expectancy of something great and interesting. Felix could talk to Changbin about the strong friendship between ravens and wolves and he's pretty sure Changbin would eat that shit up like Nutella.

It's around the time they order their second drink does Felix open up a bit more and gets more confident. “Why do you try so hard to seem so unapproachable? Or closed off?”

Changbin doesn’t answer right away, but Felix gladly gives him time to think about his answer.

“I guess it’s because before I got into music, before I became SpearB, I was some nobody kid who just had a lot of money because of my parents. I was so used to just being there, unbothersome, uninterested, lowkey lonely, but then I met Chan and it kind of changed,” Changbin shrugs, smiling as he recalls whatever memories that fill him with happiness. “He used to work at this stationery shop, and I went there one day after school to buy some books or pens or whatever, and he could tell who I was listening to. We started talking, and he never once treated me like an immature, aimless kid for not having a dream yet or a passion, but he did help me find it.”

“Which was music,” Felix said, completely immersed in the story.

“Yeah, music. I started to write, and did some mixing, and on weekends I’d meet up with him at this burger joint to show him what I had done. He’d give me pointers since he was in his first year of uni then, and I'd end up going home each time with even more knowledge than I did when I first got there,” Changbin cocks his head to the side, looking Felix straight in the eyes. He wanted to look away, but be damned if he does. “Later that year, I put up my first song on SoundCloud, and the rest I'm pretty sure you know already.”

“So the rumours are true?”

“Mhm,” he hums, sniffing a bit as he leans back into his chair, still deep in thought. “I went from a nobody to a somebody so quickly. I just feel more reassured when someone would rather not socialise with me than be disappointed in the person they might find talking to me. It’s become almost instinctual now, but I'm glad you persisted, that I was so tired and over school, and that I was forced to go to the library that day.”

Felix wants nothing more than to hold Changbin’s face between his hands and tell him how the stars could never live up to his potential. He also wants to hide under the table. The ways this man makes him feel. Insanity.

“But you're the first person I've met after Chan whos inspired me so much.”

Felix swears he almost chokes on his own spit. “Excuse me? What?”

Changbin gives him a lazy smile. Felix feels a flutter somewhere, but he has no clue where it came from. “Yeah. I mean it. When you told me how much you struggled with ADHD, I decided to look it up, and everything you’ve been doing so far this school year is inspiring. You don’t have to create constantly to be inspirational. Hard work and perseverance, a stubbornness that leaves you aching for days, makes someone more inspiring than anything else.”

Its times like these, that he wishes he could grab Changbin by the neck and just kiss him on the spot. Felix can’t think of any other way to express his emotions. How can someone he's thought he's known since the beginning of the year, be better than he ever imagined? And why on earth is he here right now, sitting opposite, telling him such sweet things, breath laced with caffeine and sugar, lips coated in acceptance and non-judgement. Felix could live in this moment, bask in this feeling, for the rest of his life, and nothing could make him happier.

Well, he's probably wrong. There's so much more about Changbin that he believes will make him happier.

The rest of the date is like an emotional rollercoaster. One second Changbin and Felix are having a heart to heart, and the next Changbin is laughing because of a story Felix told about him, Jisung, and the rest of his friends getting chased by geese by a lake because Minho refused to back down from a challenge. They sit there talking shit until they notice the sun has started setting.

“Woah, where did the time go?” Felix stares at the golden hue of the clouds as the sun sets, hidden behind buildings. Changbin doesn’t say anything, so Felix turns to him, concerned, but all Changbin is doing is staring at him. That’s it. And he kind of blushes… yeah, never mind. He totally, without a doubt, blushes at the warm look on Changbin's face as he stares at him. The setting sun lights up his face, makes it shine like honey almost, and the very soft, slight upturn of his lips, the way the one corner rises just a little bit more than the other. God, the way he notices so much is crazy. But he really can’t help but notice, to stare.

“We should go back now, probably.” Changbin interrupts Felix’s thoughts. He simply nods and gets up, finishing the last bit of cold tea as Changbin pays for their drinks. He had tried to split it with him, but he had refused, claiming that next time Felix can pay. Those words, “next time”, made Felix just a little bit breathless.

They walk out together, and slowly make their way to the uni entrance, and head off straight into the direction of the dorms. It's only then that Felix thinks to ask, “Wait, do you even live on campus?”

Changbin stops as Felix does, and shakes his head. “I've never lived on campus. Even if it’s more convenient, I prefer having my own space. Luckily it’s only ten minutes away.” Felix was about to chastise him for not telling him, but Changbin beats him to it. “It’s okay, I don’t mind walking you back to the dorms.”

Felix will not allow this, though. Changbin was nice enough to pay for their drinks (that café was not cheap, no matter how close it is to their school). “I don’t care. Let me at least walk you back home, okay?”

With his eyebrows furrowed and pout in full-swing, Changbin obviously relents super quick, but it still takes Felix by surprised. He didn’t think he would allow it but, here Changbin is, motioning for Felix to walk him home.

The walk to Changbin's apartment was a quiet one, but not one of discomfort. It was peaceful. It allowed the two of them to go over everything that had happened during their date, and in Felix’s case for sure, prove that he definitely wants to see Changbin again.

But, like it always does, his doubts come in, and he starts overthinking. Felix starts thinking that his sexuality is going to get in the way. That his need to be doing something, being active, will get in the way. Changbin is so mellow often, and it gives him a sense of peace, but Felix can only last so long before he starts fidgeting, starts doubting, starts bouncing his legs and biting his nails. All of a sudden, he sees himself as a burden only, and considers nipping it in the bud right there and then, but somehow, like some sort of miracle, a blessing, Changbin suddenly starts talking, and his worries slowly dissipate with every word, because Changbin seems to have a significant effect on him. An effect though that he is thankful for.

“I don’t know if I've mentioned this, or if Jisung or Hyunjin or anyone has mentioned this, but I'm pansexual.” Changbin starts slowing down. Felix has no choice but to do so, but it’s not like he hasn’t been caught by Changbin's words anyway. “Kinda knew most of my life, but I never really had a word for it, until I started uni. Y’know that whole LGBT+ club?” Felix just nods. “Yeah, Chan’s boyfriend helped start it when they were first years. Woojin. Anyway, I decided to check it out one day to support them for some pride event and I met this, I don’t know, kid that was close the brother of one of the members. A high school student still. And he just came up to me because I was by myself and asked me what my pronouns were. That was the first time anyone’s asked, so I was quite shocked, but it was different, and I really liked that. And somewhere along the lines, he asked me if I was queer, and I said I didn’t know. He asked if I just liked men, and I said no. He asked if I've ever been attracted to someone who was genderqueer, and I said I didn’t know. He then asked me another question about gender and attraction and I just told him that I didn’t care. I just don’t. I've never thought gender to be a factor in anything, but it’s not like I've been in many relationships anyway. And like that, he told me what pansexuality means, and that he kinda identifies as it, but not really? He's never liked labels, but it’s always easier to use one then to explain that to people.” Changbin pauses, and side-eyes Felix. He's just quiet, taking it all in, and wondering the significance of this story because nothing Changbin says isn’t significant in Felix’s eyes. “Anyway, he's really carefree about his sexuality. He's asked people, no matter the gender, on dates, or to hang out, or do whatever. He’s so not scared of rejection. And that’s why I'm telling you all of this. Yeah, it’s because I want to be more open, but also because I've never had the guts to ask anyone on a date, especially a guy, and that I think it’s pretty cool the way you did it back in the library.”

There's a lot of things Felix could say at that moment. He could tell him he's thankful, tell him he's so not as confident as he might appear sometimes. He wants to confess right there, tell him that he's fallen already. Felix wants to show how proud he is that Changbin came out to him just like that, that if it was Felix, it would’ve been harder. But he thinks about that in particular. How he owes it to Changbin to in turn express himself, and be open, and so, by skimming over what Changbin said, he does exactly what scares him the most.

“I know I might seem that way, but I'm incredibly scared, like, all the time. You're literally the first person I've ever asked out, ever gone on a date with in fact. But you are right though, it does tie with my sexuality.” He takes in a shaky breath. “It’s because I'm asexual, I think, and I never know how people will react.”

Without even a beat after Felix says that Changbin grabs Felix’s hand and makes his heart crawl up his throat, and stops him from breathing. They’re still walking, but their fingers are intertwined, in public, and Changbin looks over at Felix without a care in the world for the people around them. All he sees in Changbin's eyes is himself, and Felix decides that, no, this is the happiest he's ever been in a long, long while. “That changes nothing. Or well, to me it doesn’t. But I'm really happy you told me,” Changbin's smile is so wide that his eyes become almost non-existent. “Because I want you to be yourself always, and even though your sexuality doesn’t define you, it is part of you. And, to be frank, I do like every part of you, even the one that likes pineapple on pizza.”

Felix just laughs. He laughs and laughs all the tension away. He can’t believe that he ever thought anything like that would be an issue for Changbin. Changbin exceeded that, a lot more than most people he has known for years. “Says the one who likes dipping his chips in yoghurt.”

“It’s nutritional.”

“No, it's mad.”

Felix later drops Changbin off and leaves missing the warmth of Changbin's hand in his.

☁︎

It hadn’t even been a couple days and Changbin is missing the fuck out of Felix.

Their date three days ago was a success. More than a success, it was incredible. Every single date he's been on was nothing compared to a simple coffee in a café.

Changbin had spent his weekend with Jeongin trying really hard not to let thoughts of Felix get in the way. It was something he hasn’t needed to do in years, so it was a lot harder than he had ever expected. Jeongin was only spending the weekend at his apartment—something that happens from time to time since Changbin has an extra room in his place, and so on Sundays, before Jeongin leaves on the bus back home, Changbin is able to help him with his music work, and basically be what Chan was to him. These weekends don’t happen often, so he knew to keep quiet about something he could talk about for ages.

They all went to Stacked—a burger joint close to where Changbin lives. Chan and Woojin seemed pretty occupied as they were latched to the hip the entire walk there, which gave Jeongin and Changbin time to catch up, and honestly? He really enjoyed it. He always enjoys it.

Changbin really, really wanted to tell Jeongin about Felix though. He wanted to literally pick apart every single beautiful detail of Felix and explain every bit to Jeongin as if he's reciting a poem. But the very fact he wants to do that makes him realise he's too invested too soon, and that maybe Jeongin would rather talk about dissecting a frog in biology class (“They still do that in high school?” “Yeah, apparently it's not yet a school cliché.”).

So he had the weekend he was looking forward to for a long while now and, for most parts, Changbin was distracted by Jeongin, and Woojin’s and Chan’s continuous flirting and couple squabbles in amusement. But when Jeongin left that Sunday afternoon, it’s like everything he's been trying to distract himself from comes pouring through him again, and he finally has an opportunity to message Felix back, and maybe talk to him for way longer than he should.

**i hope you have a great weekend with your friends ^^**

**tell them i say hi !!**

**hay**

**jeongin finally left **

Changbin didn’t really have to wait a long time before his phone alerts him that Felix has messaged him back. It makes him smile, knowing that at least he isn’t the only overly eager one.

**yay now i have you all for myself**

**did you have fun?**

**<3**

**it was a nice, well-deserved break**

**but i missed you**

**you did?**

**of course**

**it was hard not telling them about you though**

**:(**

**oh **

**fhsjf**

**you make me blush ;;**

**hehe**

**are you busy?**

**not really**

**minho and i were meant to watch the new episode of are you the one together**

**but they fell asleep just as they got back from jisung TT**

**oof**

**well then**

**do you want to call?**

**hmmmmmm**

**yes ^^**

Changbin phones him that instant and Felix answers on the first ring, and he feels like he's back to feeling comfortable and calm because even though Felix might be one of the most extroverted people he knows, something about talking to him puts all of his nerves aside.

Felix starts talking about his weekend, about how he spent the whole of Saturday at dance practice with Minho, and his other friend Hyunjin (who Changbin has only met once, but they’re just mutuals on twitter), and hearing Felix's excitement was super cute. Since the end of their second term is coming soon, he has a lot of practicing to do for his dance exam (his first one of the year, so Felix is pretty nervous, but Changbin reminds him that he's going to be incredible no matter what, as long as he keeps working hard, and all Felix did was laugh at him because of how old his response made Changbin seem).

Apparently, though, Felix has his first dance showcase at the end of the year, as his final exam as well, and in the most endearing way ever, he asked Changbin if he wanted to come. Even though it's only happening in November, he doesn’t care, because even if they don’t work out, Changbin wouldn’t miss it for the world. The excitement of seeing Felix dancing really had him on edge—a rush of butterflies twirling away in his stomach. There wasn’t anything better than seeing someone flourish doing what they're so passionate about.

When Felix asked Changbin what he did, he kind of didn’t want to talk. He wanted to hear Felix tell him about literally anything, but he could hear the tiredness in Felix's voice as well, so Changbin tried his best.

“It wasn’t too eventful, but to me, it was quite a busy weekend. I don’t see Jeongin very often since he's still a high school student but whenever he comes, he, Woojin, Chan and I go to that old, vintage movie theatre close by called the Labia.”

Felix makes a sound of excitement. “The Labia? I've always wanted to go there, but I've yet to. Is it true that it's very old school and shows the most obscure movies or movies they don’t show at the cinema in general?”

Changbin mentally stores this information for later, wanting nothing more than to be with Felix as he experiences one of Changbin's and Jeongin's favourite places in the city. “Yeah, it's true. We went to watch Rocketman and, well, let’s just say that all four of us spent hours at this bar afterwards talking about how much Elton John is a musical genius.”

Felix's laugh bursts through his phone speakers. “I'm sure you music loving nerds loved it a lot, huh? I watched it by myself on my laptop last week, I think. I cried so much. I don’t think there was a point in the movie where I wasn’t crying.”

“Now that’s a big mood for Chan. He stayed latched onto Woojin throughout the whole movie. Jeongin and I were too amused, but it's kind of sweet, in a way.”

It goes silent for a bit, all Changbin can hear is Felix's soft breaths.

“I want to take you one day.”

“Take me?”

“To the Labia.”

After Felix explains that “as long as you keep that onion and chives popcorn flavouring away from my salt n vinegar popcorn, I’ll allow us to have a great time”, Changbin talks a bit about his music, and that him and Chan are considering working together on a mixtape or EP, but they feel like they're missing something, so they're busying themselves with their own work, and school. Changbin hates how he's way busier this year than last, and he expresses this to Felix who also voices how he wants to fight everyone who is making it a struggle for Changbin to work on his music. He had called Felix cute, making him huff in annoyance, but he bets Felix was full on blushing anyway.

Felix brings up something about Jisung he had no idea about. He explains that Jisung originally wanted to study music, but because his high school didn’t have music as a subject, he didn’t have any music credentials, and since the music department only takes in around thirty students a year, Jisung wasn’t accepted, but thankfully had the opportunity to study art as a major. Changbin had no clue that Jisung was even interested in music, and that he produces and writes his own music. “Whenever he finishes a song, he plays it for me and Minho, and afterwards, we always go on a rampage, because if there's anyone who deserves to be studying alongside you and Chan, it’s Jisung.” Felix had said, a sad sigh leaving his lips at the end.

“It’s true,” Changbin had said in response. “It sucks that there are such limitations, but the great thing about music is you don’t need to study it to get places. You can have a natural talent for it, or build on your skills purely by yourself.”

While they continued talking, Changbin wrote a note in his school diary to remember to contact Jisung because maybe he's what Chan and Changbin are missing. He wants to explore that, and he's pretty sure Jisung will be keen if their first meeting says as much.

Changbin would be lying though if they didn’t end up still on the call at 12pm that night.

“How long have we been talking for?” Felix yawns into the receiver, probably adorably rubbing away at his eyes.

He's used to it, though, staying up super late working or, in general, just not being able to fall asleep. He can’t think of a better way to keep him up at night.

“For a couple hours, I think.”

Felix groans. “It’s 12pm, Binnie, it’s way too late. How are you still awake?”

Changbin feels his face heat up at the nickname. He's been called many things, but Binnie? That’s new. “Ah- well, um,” God, did a stupid nickname really make him all flustered? “It's easy when it's with you, anyway.” Yeah, real smart. Flirt. That totally helps the situation.

“Shut UP.”

“I'm starting to think you might actually mean the opposite of that.”

Felix's voice goes extra soft, extra sweet. “Of course I don’t want you to stop.”

Changbin moves to his bed, internally flailing. What did he do to deserve a time like this? Getting into bed and perhaps falling asleep to the sound of a deep, scratchy, sleepy voice.

There's a pause, but Changbin senses it from Felix. It makes him feel uneasy, the way this silence seems to drag on.

It’s when he's lying in bed and trying to get comfy, Felix speaks up again, slowly, reserved, but strong. “I really like you. Like, like you like you. A LOT like you. All the likes, I have them for you.”

“Felix-“

“I wanted to tell you this weekend but you were too busy to meet up again, and now I'm just too tired. I really like you, so please stay.”

Changbin lets out a low chuckle. He would’ve squirmed, rolled around, screamed sweet nothings into his pillow, but Felix is remaining so calm over the line, he can’t go freaking out on him. Changbin doesn’t think Felix is ready for that side of him so late at night. “I'm not going anywhere.”

“Good,” Felix says firmly, making Changbin crack a smile.

“You know I like you a lot too, right?”

“More than a friend?”

“I wouldn’t talk to a friend over the phone for hours on end, dummy.”

Felix lets out this high-pitched sound of relief, Changbin guesses. “Okay. Okay cool. Cool. I'm glad. Super glad. On top of the moon glad. I feel like I could literally build a whole computer from scratch just to access twitter to explain how glad I am. I think I am just the gladdest.”

“You need to sleep.”

“Fuck, yeah, I know. I do.”

As they're saying their goodnights, Felix surprises Changbin yet again. Felix is filled with surprises, so of course, he would catch Changbin off guard before they hang up.

“Can I call you my boyfriend?”

This time Changbin actually stuffs his face in his pillow, muffling his voice. “Yes, please. As long as it’s true.”

“It IS true,” he states, matter-of-factly. “Call me your boyfriend too, okay?”

“Whatever you say, boyfriend.”

“The way that makes me feel, Binnie.”

Changbin snickers. “The way YOU make me feel, Lix.”

He bets they're both squirming on the inside. “I'm going to seriously slap you so hard tomorrow.”

“Don’t forget to kiss me first.”

Felix goes off on some tangent way too fast for Changbin to keep up. “-but whatever! Goodnight!”

Only when Changbin says it back does Felix hang up.

With the phone still firmly gripped in his hand, Changbin falls asleep with the most ease he ever has in a long time, with the warm and exciting feeling, and anticipation, for that kiss he hopes Felix will give to him tomorrow.

**Author's Note:**

> hope yall died just as much as i did :))) 
> 
> this one-shot is named after the neighbourhoods song softcore (alternative title, "filled my void", lyrics from their song void, check it out yall). its rlly a bop so i recommend checking it out and like all their music ?? yeah ?? some good good motivating music for writing
> 
> thanks again for reading. this is my first fic on this acc (MinClou is my other acc but it only has one 3k yoonkook fic thats idk alright ig) and my first skz related fic too <3 i didnt rlly edit it very well so if theres mistakes, my bad frsjf
> 
> (constructive criticism is always welcome !!)


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